#How to make vegan mac and cheese

[northbirdblog]

Vegan Mac and Cheese

Another easy Vegan meal from the Northbird kitchen!

[pansyfemme]

my vegan food take is that I will always prefer to learn about/try/make an existing plant based meal from a culture i’m unfamilar with than look at the worlds 30 millionth vegan mac and cheese recipe.. I love seitan fried chicken as much as everyone else but in terms of vegan recipes sometimes I would like to just learn how to make my vegetables taste better rather than attempt fake meat again

[leth-writes]

bait

SUMMARY: Damian would like to welcome you to the family.

WARNINGS: 18+ as always on my blog, though the work is safe for work. Typical yandere shenanigans.

MASTERLIST: https://www.tumblr.com/leth-writes/757800060720496640/requests-open?source=share 

Requests are open!

Normally, Damian would hate being babied. He was a trained assassin, the blood of Ra’as Al Ghoul ran through his veins, he was the son of the feared Bat! And yet, here he was, sitting in your kitchen, watching you make him some (vegan) mac n’ cheese. 

Originally, Damian did not understand the obsession his family seemed to have with you. He spent days complaining, stomping around the manor, irritated that his family was wasting time with some… weakling. It seemed that every time he walked into a room, the only topic of discussion was you.

As one of the newer additions to the family, and a biological one at that, it seemed he had missed out on something vital to his family. So, he decided to just… ask, as his father would advise,  just why they were wasting time on someone who wouldn’t ever be able to adhere to the illustrious standards his family had set. 

The person he decided on was Grayson, someone he normally looked up to.

He sat across from his older brother, who was preoccupied with that insipid app that Drake had designed, keeping track of your vitals and ensuring your safety. Finally, fed up with being ignored, Damian cleared his throat to alert his brother of his presence.

Grayson looked up and beamed, bouncing up to flop down next to Damian. 

“What’s up, lil’ D?” Grayson asked, voice jovial even as he spared a glance at his screen.

“Tt. Grayson, I must… request your assistance.”

“Anything for you, lil’ D!” Grayson leaned over and rustled Damian’s hair. Damian, annoyed, fixed his hair and leaned away.

“I do not… I do not understand your recent… Preoccupation. It seems the family has decided, rather unanimously, that we will be gaining a new member. I do not understand why we must lower our standards!” He huffed, crossing his arms.

Grayson’s eyes softened. “Oh, lil’ D. It’s alright, you’re new, we should’ve known this would be confusing…” He looked away, staring out the window for a second, letting out a little sigh. 

“I’m not really sure how to explain it, but sometimes, sometimes people, especially people like us, get… passionate. Dinah likes to explain it away as the way we… deal with the constant loss, the uncertainty. Vigilantes don’t ever do anything in halves, afterall.”

“But why, but why them? They have nothing to add to our family, Grayson! They cannot fight, they are not trained, they have no extraordinary skills!” Damian huffed.

“Well, it doesn’t always make sense, Damian, and it doesn’t need to. Sometimes, sometimes people just… click, it doesn’t always have to make logical sense. I think if you got to know them, maybe you’d understand it a bit better.”

Grayson smiled, looking back at Damian. Damian looked away, blushing. He didn’t like not getting something; it made him feel vulnerable, weak, like he was missing out on something everyone else just seemed to get.

“And this is, this is… typical, for vigilantes such as our family?” He asked, voice quiet with mortification. Grayson smiled softly.

“Of course, Lil’ D. There’s nothing wrong with being passionate, and there’s no way we’re gonna let someone else get hurt. I mean, just think about it; do you think they could defend themselves?” 

Damian shook his head.

“And there’s no way they’ll be able to defend themselves. As vigilantes, especially in Gotham, we see the truth, we see how nasty the world can truly be. Most civilians just don’t get it. So, I think we can be forgiven for being a little intense, right?” He laughed, elbowing Damian gently.

“I mean, just think about Jon getting hurt.” 

Damian scowled. “I would not allow it. It would never happen.” He said, certainty clear in his voice.

Grayson snorted. “I know, Lil’ D. I’m just using him as an example; now take those feelings, and imagine if Jon couldn’t defend himself. “

“I-I do not know what I would do.”

“And that’s okay, you’ll get it eventually, okay? It’s hard to come to terms with, at first.”

“I still do not understand why you have chosen such an unworthy target for your affections, but I will… try. To understand.” Damian looked down, face tinged slightly red in embarrassment. 

Grayson ruffled his hair again, and peeked at his screen. “Maybe ask Cass to take you, or Jason? I have a shift in a little while. I’m sure they’d be willing to help you, Damian. It’s okay to have questions, to not get it. It’ll click eventually.”

So, Damian did.

While embarrassing, the idea of not getting something that was clearly of high importance to his family rankled in his chest. So, he approached Cain and asked for her help.

She was in her studio, as she normally was at noon on the weekends, working on a new routine. Damian paused in the door, waiting for her to finish up. No matter how many times he saw her, especially during her performances, he was always surprised by just how graceful the young woman managed to be.

It was normal for his family to move with a lithe grace, especially Grayson, who seemed to move so fluidly he lacked a skeletal structure, couldn’t compete with the natural poise Cain held herself with.

She finished up her routine with a flourish, then rose to her feet with a sigh. She floated over to her water bottle and took a sip, before turning around to face Damian. She smiled gently, eyes crinkling at the corners, her slightly damp choppy black hair framing her face perfectly.

“Little brother,” she said, delight clear in her voice. 

“Cain,” Damian greeted, nodding his head and moving into the room.

Cain sank to the floor, back against the mirrored wall, and patted the wooden floor next to her. 

“Sit,” she said.

He did. There was no refusing Cain, after all.

“You seem… confused.” She glanced over at him, taking another small sip.

“Yes. I do not… Understand the new obsession you have all taken with that Civilian.”

Cain nodded. “Yes.”

“Grayson explained the general feelings of protectiveness, but was unable to elaborate; why them?” Damian crinkled his face, nose scrunching.

Cain laughed. “Stubborn, not seeing.” She poked his forehead, startling him. He scowled further, rubbing the spot. It didn’t really hurt, but he was not about to let her get away with poking him like a child!

She snickered at his bewildered expression. 

“It is hard to explain… Instinct.” She hummed, looking away in contemplation.

“Innocence. They do not know… the violence, the heartache… they are kind.”

So it was about the contrast, Damian concluded. The difference between a trained vigilante and a weakling.

“They cannot… protect self. Need help. Like baby.” She continued, sighing and leaning a hand against her cheek, propped against her knees.

“Like… Like Titus, or Alfred the cat. Need looking after.”

Just like that, it clicked.

You were utterly defenseless. Completely alone, with no one to prevent you from being hurt, or worse, killed. You were like a young kitten, unable to open their eyes to see their savior, like the one Damian had fostered.

A warmth bloomed in his chest. You would be like the kitten, and he would protect your innocence, no matter the cost.

Cass smiled widely, scrunching her nose. 

Just like that, Damian was clamoring to get involved. He could not wait until you were home, and he would be able to ensure your safety, keeping you from losing that childlike innocence, that thin film over your eyes preventing you from seeing the true danger.

It was Drake who had the brilliant idea to place Damian in the field; Damian, for all of his sword-related faults, was still young, after all. Someone as naive as you would be sure to enjoy looking after such a cute child, not being able to see who was truly caring for who.

While both Grayson and Todd had failed to make your acquaintance, it seemed you were too aware of stranger danger to fully fall for the ruse, he knew Cain had made inroads as a member of your book club. Surely, having a young brother by her side would only make it easier to get closer to you.

And just like that, the trap was set, and Damian was ready to act.

The next week, your book club would be meeting to discuss the selected offerings. You had wisely offered up Pride and Prejudice. Damian could still hear the muffled curses Todd had let out; you had no clue the extent to which you had so thoroughly endeared yourself to him, just by picking an Austen novel. Damian could not help but be amused, Todd was easy to enthrall despite his tough exterior; it was almost comical. 

Cain had brought him with, dressed in clothes he was told were appropriate for his age (Grayson had laughed and forced him to stand for pictures. He would secure his revenge, and make sure to talk badly about him. He would be victorious in the so-called prank war, after all, and you would stand at his side, unscathed.).

You opened the door, smiling and bringing Cain in for a hug. Even from his position, he could see Cain melt into the hug, smiling and bringing an arm up to pat your back gently.

“Hello,” she sighed as you pulled back, looking her over.

“Oh, Hello!” you said, looking down at Damian. 

He sighed internally. It would take everything he had, but the thoughts of showing you Bat-Cow would get him through the evening. He smiled brightly, artificially pitching his voice up slightly.

“Hi!” He said, stepping forward and shaking your hand with vigor. “I’m Cass’s brother, Damian!”

“Oh, so you have a brother?” You said, smiling even brighter. It almost hurt Damian’s face in sympathy, how widely you were able to smile. Was it due to your innocence?

You ushered the two of them inside.

“Yes, Our father forgot Damian would be home tonight, and did not arrange for a babysitter.”

“Oh, that’s more than alright! Here, are you hungry, kiddo? I’ll make you something to snack on while the book club gets going! Cass, you can take a seat if you want.”

Damian watched as you puttered around the kitchen, enamored with the way you seemed completely oblivious to the danger present in your home. You were lucky he was there to protect you; what if Cass hadn’t been a kind person? You would’ve had no idea you were letting a threat into your house, and into your life! Luckily for you, Cass would never harm a hair on your head, let alone let you get hurt.

“Milk okay for the Mac n’ cheese, kiddo?” You asked, not bothering to turn around as you pulled down a box.

He informed you he was vegan.

You took it in stride, pulling out some soy milk. He was almost surprised you would have some, but your clear kindness would never allow you to potentially offend a guest. Damian could feel a bout of cuteness aggression overtaking him, and he clenched his fists hard enough to draw blood under the lip of the counter.

The rest of the night passed without incident, though you seemed particularly interested in Damian’s contributions to the conversation about Austen’s works. He could not help but be satisfied at the impression he had made; it was not his fault the majority of the people you surrounded with could not understand basic literary analysis, after all.

Every week for the next few months, Damian would tag along to book club; he eventually managed to become your favorite conversational partner, though Cain was a close second, as you slowly began to ignore the others in the club. It was better this way, after all; they could not protect you.

However, Damian soon became frustrated by the lack of progress. They were talking to you regularly, yes, but he wanted you safe at home! He could tell the others were building in frustration as well, and yet the consensus remained; they would need to take more time.

So, he approached Todd.

And Todd agreed.

The plan was set.

Damian waited breathlessly in the alley by your workplace. It would be easy, after all, to get you to follow him down into the dark.

The second he saw you, he took a few wide steps back, and began to scream.

“Help!” He shouted, crumpling to the floor. He let his voice take on a tinge of desperation, pitching slightly higher to exaggerate his innocence and hopefully trigger your panic so you would approach without a second thought.

It worked, and your pounding footsteps soon approached.

“Hello?!” You called, frantically dropping to your knees in front of his crumpled form.

“D-Damian?” You cried, searching desperately for the injury.

Behind you, he could see Todd approach, syringe in hand. 

He let out a groan and rolled over, head in your lap. As you ran your hands over his back, looking for something, he surreptitiously grabbed your waist, hoping to prevent you from running, just in case.

Finally, Todd was in range. He stuck the syringe into your neck without a second thought, and you were out like a light.

Damian was just glad your hand had landed in his hair.

[pseudophan]

PHANNIE COOKBOOK SIGN-UPS!!

Do you have a really good recipe you think Dan and Phil would enjoy? Consider submitting it to this collaborative phannie cookbook that will be given to DnP at a meet & greet! It will also be available to everyone to download as a PDF.

Family recipes or your favourite dish from your country/culture is a bonus, but it doesn’t have to be that personal. All I ask is that you don’t go rip something random off the Internet right now just to be in the book, I want food you genuinely enjoy!

I’ve decided the most efficient way of doing this is to let you submit up to 3 different options, that way if there are any repeats (and I’m certain there will be) I won’t have to message everyone it concerns to ask if you have any alternatives. Besides, that way I can choose which version gets in based on your other options rather than which one “sounds better” to me, cause I think that would be a little unfair. I also have no idea how many people will actually participate in this yet, which is currently the biggest hurdle in terms of planning. If only a few sign up there is a chance we’ll end up using multiple recipes by some, and if somehow we get too many I’ll have to pick and choose. I do really want to include as many people as possible, but until I actually see the recipes it’s hard to tell what will end up happening.

The main focus of this will be actual food, but we obviously need to include a few desserts, so feel free to submit those as well just be aware the chances of those getting picked might be lower. The same goes for soups, I assume a lot of people have soup recipes and we might include a couple, but for obvious reasons it's a low priority.

Some key things to keep in mind:

Phil is a bit picky and has some dietary restrictions! He shouldn’t have dairy or chocolate and he doesn’t like cheese or mushrooms, among other things. That doesn’t mean you have to avoid these things entirely, but maybe your grandma’s mac and cheese recipe isn’t the best choice

While neither of them is vegan they do eat a lot of vegan food, so we definitely need some vegan dishes. I also think it would be really great if you suggested vegetarian and/or vegan substitutions you know work well with your recipe! That isn’t a must for every dish, but it’s a nice addition where possible

Tragically, Dan and Phil are British, meaning they won’t necessarily have access to all the same ingredients as you. Luckily they are also rich and live in a major city with a lot of options so they aren’t limited to what they can find at their local Tesco, but since the aim of this book is to encourage them to cook we probably shouldn’t be sending them on a scavenger hunt either. I don’t think this will be a huge issue, but if your recipe calls for something you think might be very niche or local to you it might be worth googling it or asking around

The final book will be using UK measurements, but if your recipe doesn’t then don’t even worry about it for now. We’ll get to that later. You also don’t have to worry about typing out the whole step-by-step in detail in the sign-up form, I just need a list of the ingredients and roughly how to prepare it to gauge whether it’s a good fit.

I promise I’m almost done yapping but lastly, about some of the questions on the form - you don’t need to know exactly how long the dish takes to prepare, that will depend on the person or people making it anyway, but we do need a rough estimate. The difficulty level is obviously quite subjective, but I just want to hear how you personally would rank it, and if there is a specific part of the process you think someone who doesn’t cook a lot might struggle with. As for the last question about photos, I’m asking both if you have the time and opportunity to make the food and if you are able to take a good photo of it. Obviously it doesn’t have to be anything professional, a phone camera is fine, it just needs to be well lit and decent quality.

Okay, I think that’s everything-

Here's the sign-up form

The deadline is in a week, at midnight Thursday to Friday CET :)

(I also made a blog for this @phookbook for information and updates! A lot of it will probably still be on this blog, but I'll try to post/reblog the most important things on there for those who want to keep up with everything but who may not want to deal with all the chaos of pseudophan)

[urautismdiagnosis-wistie]

Yall ever think like, considering above and beyond, like its been years for them and they're so experienced.

the octo agents met them with all this cool tech and experience and protocol and ability

but like none of them know that barnacles kwazii and peso once wore a fake walrus costume in order to pretend to be a walrus

none of them know that dashi barnacles and kwazii tried to escape THE INSIDE OF A WHALES MOUTH by just :') RUNNING FULL SPEED AT THE BALEEN PLATES (weird whale teeth)

none of them know about the time professor inkling tentacle wrestled a giant squid TRYING TO FIGHT/EAT THE ENTIRE OCTOPOD?

none of them know about THE CONE SNAIL INCIDENT

LIKE??? couldu imagine being like an agent of what's essentially water based rescue NASA and then u find out the guy in charge absolutely tried to rescue his coworker by "waving through kwaziis spaghetti distraction" or whatever the fck (kawaii was going to "distract the whale by weaving around like a piece of spaghetti or something similar LMSO)

like I just haven't seen anyone talking to how they must look to outsiders

like. They eat kelp in EVERYTHING. and its not like they're just like all in a vegan world, paani canonically enjoys dried bugs. I'm sure there's some animals that are like, more irl animal behaviours or whatever lol

butseriously, kelp cakes, kelp biscuits, kelp marshmallows, kelp kebabs, kelp stew- Yeah these btches autistic-

but seriously imagine going to your friends house and their ENTIRE FAMILY just offers you "lentil cake!" or "lentil Mac and cheese!" or "lentil chicken nuggets!" wouldnt they look fcking crazy?

i just think its funny cuz like "oh yeah shout-out to the one time a bunch of sea creatures literally stole the octopod hahaha or lol, the time we flooded the ship so slippy the sea cucumber would be able to breathe under water haha, man we must have purposefully flooded the octopod what? three times at least? "

LIKE WHAT ARE THE UNDER SEA SHENANIGANS-

like I just want ONE octo-agent (and it cant be paani this guy would just be like "oh yeah makes sense :)" to look at them and go??? yo what the FCK? oh God... maybe the ocean pressure effected their brains?!"

LIKE-

like yeah they're all SO FCKING serious about ping pong too, and they all absolutely have the weirdest behaviours because these guys have spent literal years in the middle of the ocean with eachother 😭

i just love them so much-

[swee7dream]

hi hi my vix !! its kae,, i wanted to send in a req!

i've been missing taeyong so much (who isn't) and was wondering if you could write smt with cg!taeyong ? thank you thank you ( ^ω^ )

playing restaurant w cg!taeyong gn! regressor! reader | dni if u sexualize having childlike JOY and FUN

“Ding ding!” You tap your imaginary bell. “Order up! One apple spaghetti with dolphin fresh out of the oven!”

“What? That’s not what I ordered,” Taeyong complains a little while away from you, knees to his chest as he sits on the floor in front of the makeshift table made of stacked up hardcovers. “I ordered a burger with fries!”

“What?” You frown. Eyebrows clashing with each other, you fix your chef's hat and rest your fists on your hips. “What is that? We don't server furgers and bries!”

“Wuh-?!” Taeyong tried to act baffled, but his act of being a too demanding (but really, quite normal) customer breaks with the smile he can't hold back. “What kind of restaurant is this?!”

“’s a alien restaurant!” You straighten your posture. “Duh!”

“An alien restaurant?”

“Yeah! Either eat my cooking or beat it, human!”

“Aren't you a human, too?”

“No, Bubu, not right now.” You pause the scene for a second, lowering your voice. “I’m a alien. I’m purple and got black eyes and four arms.” You extend your arms for him to see your newly formed arms with his mind's eye.

“Oh.” He whispers back. “Okay. Sorry, baby.”

“’s okay.”

“Fine, fine! I guess, I’ll eat your alien food if you insist.” Taeyong quickly jumps back into character. “It can't be as good as anything I’ve had on Earth though. Hey, is this real dolphin? I’m vegetarian.”

“No, you’re not!”

“For this play pretend, I am!”

You squint at him.

“Fine.” You cross your arms and turn to look to the side. “’s not real dolphin. Those things died a bajillion years ago. Imitation dolphin.”

“So it’s vegetarian?”

“Vegan.”

“Oh…” Taeyong extends his lips into a curious pout. “I don't like vegan food…”

“Just eat the food, human!” You shout, pointing at your Play-Doh apple spaghetti with blue 'dolphin' cuts.

“Fine! Fine…” Taeyong takes a bite of air. “Woah.”

“Yeah.” You close your eyes and nod. “I know.”

“This is amazing!” He starts. “The flavors are exploding in my mouth!”

“That's the dynamite.”

“It’s so colorful!”

“The paint.”

“The flavors melt in my mouth!”

“’cause of the candles.”

“Please!” Taeyong looks up at you, grabbing your hand. “Teach me how to cook like this.”

You stand up, looking down at his pleading expression.

“No.”

“No?!” You could almost see his heart shattering into a million pieces as you look into his eyes. “Why not?”

“’cause I’m hungry, Bubu.”

“Oh.” The human food supremacist character fades away as Taeyong’s shoulders slump. “Craving anything in specific, Bug?”

“Mmm, mac 'n' cheese!”

“Mac and cheese?” he repeats. “…I guess I can make that happen.”

note kae ... KAE ... pls is our mootship still valid ? SAY YES . PLEASE . i'm so sorry . i literally haven't written in months . i know it's short but i'm trying to get back in the writing groove . sorry not sorry for the dolphin slander btw . they freak me out so bad .

[stardropsaloongossiptrain]

Bachelor/ettes and Cooking

Gonna rank how I think the marriage candidates would do in the kitchen

----

Bachelors:

Elliott -- it takes a while, but once the man has a real kitchen at his disposal and some encouragement to try, I think he would really enjoy cooking and could be very good at it! I HC him as growing up in a wealthy home where he probably wasn't allowed to cook for himself, and then the cabin has nothing... but he remembers dishes he really enjoyed. I like to think he starts cooking just trying to help out once he moves to the farm, and there is DEF a learning curve... but there's a master chef hiding in there. I can feel it.

Alex -- you do not grow up with Grannie Evelyn and not learn how to cook. Impossible. Now, he's not a fancy chef by any means, but he can make a meal without issue. If you get this man a grill, he will 1000% become Grill Master, Kiss the Cook apron wearing Grill Dad. Also, though he rarely does it, he can bake up a storm. Generally only bakes for birthdays.

Harvey -- He can cook, but only cooks healthy meals. He will need to be taught that it's okay to season your food. Brown rice, steamed veggies, and plain tofu/ chicken breasts type guy. Otherwise, it's pre-packaged frozen food. Maybe he can get better w/ encouragement but he's always going to be checking portions and making sure you eat plenty of fruits and vegetables and watch your sodium intake. The most likely bachelor to be vegetarian/ be willing to go vegetarian. Gets nauseated if he's preparing meat.

Shane -- Mid-tier like Harvey, but even though he's had kitchen access he rarely feels like cooking. He knows what seasoning is-- his usual cooking style is the exact opposite of Harvey, mostly family recipes. All flavor, calorie count who?? Loves making food covered in cheese, sauce, or gravy. His chili would win awards, but he only makes it once a year.

Sam -- He could keep himself alive if the box has directions. Anything more complicated than boxed mac and cheese, though, and he gets a little lost. Can help YOU in the kitchen very well, but to be honest he would rather be doing something more exciting.

Sebastian -- The only one who is a worse cook than him is Abigail. He is NOT allowed in the kitchen even to watch. Could burn iced tea.

---

Bachelorettes

Emily -- Oldest sister + working at the Saloon added together means she's definitely going to be a decent cook, but she genuinely enjoys cooking. She loves to experiment with different cultural dishes. She only cooks vegetarian or vegan dishes.

Penny -- She's pretty self sufficient. I don't think she knows too many recipes, but she enjoys experimenting if she moves to the farmhouse. She's very adapt at stretching a budget, and I think she would enjoy making jams/ pickles. Not the big amount the farmer does, but small batches in special flavors.

Leah -- She's a simple cook. She prefers raw dishes, or things like buddha bowls. A lot of texture and flavor. Loves using herbs and edibles from foraging locally. Leans vegetarian but doesn't mind fish from time to time.

Maru -- Maru is proficient at cooking, but I think takes after her dad too much and is very nutrient focused vs what actually makes a good meal. Occasionally makes questionable decisions in the name of efficiency. Could go from making some sort of casserole if busy w/ a project to Extremely Experimental if she has the time. No in between.

Haley -- I considered putting her higher but no. She has rarely if ever had to cook for herself before, so if she's at the farmhouse she will be surprised if you expect her to do anything in the kitchen. Eventually I think she could be fine. It's not hard. She just hates doing dishes. Enjoys baking somewhat, especially w/ Alex.

Abigail -- She eats rocks as a snack and thinks if you just crank the oven to 600 for fifteen minutes it's better than 350 for an hour. Her stomach is alien to this world. Can and will eat anything without issue.

[ofc-vi-writes-too]

a continuation of things that i think happen in my favorite fucked up silly little city (gotham)

• In hosptials in Gotham there’s another wing dedicated to super villain attacks Like how theres the ED, NICU, L&D, ICU, etc., theres another branch called Excessive Villain Attack Department (for) Emergencies. Also known as EVADE for short. it’s a brag to say you work in EVADE for doctors/nurses because A. the pay is ridiculously good, and B. how much extra stuff you had to learn to work there. People who work in EVADE have to go through weekly psych evaluations as well as physical testing to make sure they are still fit for duty.

• there are EVADE pop ups all around gotham so it’s citizens ares never more than 5 minutes away from medical attention. You have to work at a pop up before you’re allowed to work in EVADE in a real hosptial. People say working the pop ups is a lot harder and a lot nore stressfull, because people can come to you in really any condition out there.

• Similar to how kids in some areas cant wear certain colors like red or blue to school because of gang affiliation, gothamite students cannot wear anything superhero, vigilante or villain adjacent. No birds, bats, clowns, etc. Its a way for schools to try and stop kids from being targetted by their peers/ crazy adults who will attack them for supporting a specific person or party. Hero or otherwise.

• A lot of mom and pop diners/townie bars have foods named after vigilantes and specialty drinks named after villains. Some examples are:

Red Hoods Hot Chicken and Mac: bufallo mac and chicken with house hot sauce, so hot and tasty it will bring tears to your eyes! (this is true. jason tried it and he literally couldn’t feel his face. He couldn’t tell if he was blinking or not. Dick swears up and down he wasn’t.)

Nightwings: boneless chicken wings with a honey barbecue dry rub, with bleu cheese dipping sauce and chips and a blue corn dip. Dick can and will order 4 and eat them all by himself in one sitting.

Robins Eggs Breakfast combo: 2 sunny side up eggs, strawberry french toast, vegetarian sausage, house salad and an OJ. They tried to make it vegan but no one in Gotham wants breakfast without eggs. Robin said he appreciates the thought anyway. He is very smug and protective of his meal and the restaurant that made it. When he has the day shft he stops by there for breakfast, which isn’t often but still.

Signal soup: a classic squash soup, house focaccia and a garden salad. Its a seasonal meal that comes around every fall, and sells out almost every day for the entire season.

The Scarecrow: literally a long island iced tea with black liqueur in a martini glass with 3 olives. It tastes fucking horrible but will get you beyond hammered

Poison Ivy: shot of pochteca lime liqueur and pink whitney. Very tasty.

Regulator: its a blue margarita with coconut milk in it. Its a little sweet but its yummy. It’s common to black out on these because you cant taste the alch and by the time it hits you its too late and its the next morning and your naked in a strangers bed. Darn those regulators for a night you wont remember! at least the guy is handsome…

• See also the Condiment King challenge: A pint size glass of equal parts ketchup, mustard, pickle relish, mayonnaise, hot sauce, soy sauce, honey mustard, sweet and sour, bbq, salsa, fish sauce, vinegar, ranch, and wasabi. Hell in a cup! If you can drink it within 10 minutes without throwing up, you eat free at the dinner for a month and you get a t shirt that says “I completed the Condiment King challenge at Jimbo’s Dinner!” With a poorly drawn picture of condiment king on it. There has only been one winner: Timothy Drake. Jason dared him to try it after he hadnt slept in 3 days. Tim didnt puke, but Jason did. There were threats of violence if Tim ever told anyone that. Tim didn’t believe him, told Dick and magically ended up with a broken finger. “No AlfredI have NOOOOOO idea how it happened! Must’ve had a bad fall on patrol :3”

• taxes in gotham are shit-your-pants-when-you-see-it-the-first-time high. Gotham has to be able to pay for all the damages somehow, despite Bruce Wayne paying for about 15% of those damages out of pocket, its still not enough to stop prices from skyrocketing. To try and combat this, there is a Gala held anually for the top 10% of Gotham to fundraise for emergency city repairs. It helps a lot but doesn’t solve the problem.

[h1nx0]

TOPCOMMENT RTC

you guys don't understand how much I love them I want to put them into a blender and drink them. They would go on dates to like the dumbest fucking places every Mischa would bring her to a Applebee's and she'd be like "awh babe you remembered I like the Mac and cheese here" or some shit. she would hold him at gun point and make him watch whatever dumb fuck musical she likes ( I know its ironic cause they're like in a musical but she'd love them ) and at the end she'd be like "what did you think" and he'd be like "woah" and then she'd make him watch it AGAIN but this time pause it every couple of minutes and explain everything about that scene that in implyed that she has picked up on and figured out even if its like super obvious and he's just like "oh em gosh I didn't think of that" when oh em gosh he did think of that. Their the type of motherfuckers to be like "what if we tried going vegan together" and then two days later order a meat lovers pizza at 12am cause everything else was closed and "plain cheese is boring"

[cal-daisies-and-briars]

And last but not least here’s some presents for you! I’d apologize for how I just spammed your inbox buuuuuuut I’m not really sorry :p

🎁🎁🎁🎁🎁🎁🎁🎁🎁 (story that’s currently making you giggle the most)

🎁🎁🎁🎁🎁🎁🎁🎁🎁 (story that’s currently making you cry the most - somehow I think I’ll be able to guess which it is)

🎁🎁🎁🎁🎁🎁🎁🎁🎁 (story whose current chapter/section you’re currently most proud of)

🎁🎁🎁🎁🎁🎁🎁🎁🎁 (whatever’s calling you to write right now)

Oh also I had a question! Obviously feel free to ignore if you don’t want to answer but I was thinking about how you’ve covered so many classic magical fanfic tropes (all with such uniquely fun takes on them) I was wondering if there’s any others you’re hoping to do someday? Like are there any other tropes you have some vague ideas for or that you love to read and would want to write if inspiration struck? No pressure obviously I just love hearing about your ideas/processes!

Thank you as always for sharing your work that brings me such joy!!!

- PCA <3

Okay doing these while working on trying to finish up Your Fake Name is Good Enough for me, so that won't be in here. Thank you for these, PCA!

As to your question, I'm really down for anything trope wise. There are some themes i won't cover but otherwise I'd like to do anything really. I'm pretty open! More monster fics maybe? Idk I'm working my way through fic request form submissions and Bad Things Happen Bingo so we will see what's inspired from that.

For the story that's making me giggle the most, I'll have to go with 🧜🏼‍♂️ - so 27 for 🧜🏼‍♂️:

---

Buck is experiencing massive amounts of betrayal today. From his partner, who believes he is the problem today. From his body, which has decided to keep a line of shimmering scales running across his stomach. And, now, from his more-or-less brother-in-law. Who is simply annoying. 

They’re at an octopus call. Literally. An octopus evaded near death at a seafood restaurant, slipped through the vents to the floor below, and landed on a woman’s head. She nearly suffocates. 

“Should we pause?” Chim asks as they exit through the restaurant after freeing the woman. “Take a moment of silence for our beloved ocean critters?”

Buck sighs. 

Eddie shakes his head.

Hen snickers.

“Chim…” Bobby cautions.

Ravi looks confused. “Wait, are you vegan? Or, uh, vegetarian? You were way too excited about mac and cheese earlier to be vegan.”

“I’m not a vegetarian or a vegan,” Chim answers with a smirk. “I’m just an empath.”

“You’re full of it, is what you are,” Eddie jokes. 

Ravi laughs. 

Buck glares at him. “You don’t even know why it’s funny.”

---

27 for the one that has made me cry most is ���� EASILY. The other night, I was thinking about a scene for towards the end and sobbed so hard my dog had to lay on my chest. The only other one that has MAYBE made me cry that I'm currently writing in Gentle on My Mind, and NOTHING like this:

Putting it under the cut because it's an upsetting scene.

---

There is only one feasible solution. Only one thing Eddie can think to do. 

And it involves breaking a promise. 

For so long, Eddie was only a parent to one person. Chris was the sole center of his universe, without having to share. He’d hear about parents having to make terrible choices. Which kid do you help first when both are in danger? The Sophie’s Choice question made real. He could never relate. He never had to fathom it.

He makes it today in a snap second. He doesn’t even think twice. 

Maisy is still in his arms. He walks out onto the road, carrying her, writing and crying. Stony-faced, Eddie drops to his knees beside his husband and son. 

“Eddie,” Buck moans. “Eddie, I’m… I tried… I couldn’t…”

Eddie ignores him. He can’t hear this. He can’t accept it.

He holds Maisy out towards Christopher. He grabs one of her little hands and presses it against his broken body.

“Fix him, Maisy.”

Buck’s face freezes. A secondary kind of horror adds itself to the already present doom in his eyes. 

---

27 for the part I am currently most proud of is still🌕 (sorry I am obsessed with writing this):

---

“Maisy, fix him,” Eddie commands again. “Fix him. Help him.”

There’s a crowd of people behind them, watching. Eddie can hear sirens in the distance.

“Maisy.”

She’s shrieking. Despondent. It doesn’t even occur to Eddie what he’s forcing her to look at. 

“Stop,” Buck begs through tears. “Eddie, stop. She can’t.”

Eddie doesn’t listen.

“Maisy. Maisy, please. Fix my boy.”

She just cries. She cries and cries and cries and doesn’t even try to fix this broken thing. 

“He’s my baby,” Eddie is sobbing now. He’s realized, underneath this frantic display, that she simply can’t do what he’s asking. “Please save him. Please save my son.”

“Enough,” Buck finally snaps. Still holding Christopher, he lurches to yank Maisy out of Eddie’s arms. 

Maisy buries herself in Buck’s arms, crying so much she’s shaking. 

And with that, Buck snatches away all the remaining dregs of Eddie’s hope. With that, it’s over.

---

And 27 for whatever I'm called to write? WELL I HAVE NO SHAME AT ALL. More for 🌕:

---

He still suspects they’re stress-related, and what was more stressful than what happened at that crosswalk? He knew a dream was coming. He’s hardly been in a restful sleep, due to the anticipation. He’s ready to comfort his husband. 

It doesn’t go the way Buck expects.

Eddie flies upright, gasping and crying. Buck moves to hold him.

“It’s okay,” he whispers. “You’re awake. It wasn’t real.”

Usually, this would be the point where Eddie would sort of melt into him and explain how very real it felt. How awful. He’d be shaky and unsteady and Buck would need to be strong for him. 

This time, Eddie is fine.

“I know,” he breathes.

“Good,” Buck strokes his back. “That’s really good.”

“It’s not real,” Eddie says.

“I know, I know it isn’t,” Buck echoes. 

“No. Buck. It’s not real.”

“I’ve been saying that,” Buck nods.

“You don’t understand,” Eddie says. “I just had the most horrific dream I’ve ever had in my life. I just… Christopher died in front of us.”

[swordshapedleaves]

I'm watching Gastronauts. There's no way this skinny blond guy can make vegan mac and cheese half as good as my vegan mac and cheese. How the fuck is a butternut squash gonna be "cheddary"

[peachybutch]

How Good the RvB Main Cast is at Cooking, Ranked from Best to Worst

1. Donut

Donut gives off the vibe of one of those gay men with a baking channel on YouTube. This man's out here rolling up to the red team monthly dinner club with frenched rack of lamb with a pistachio mint crust and wine accompaniment, then earl grey souffle with creme anglaise for dessert. He spends hours experimenting with new and interesting ingredients. Remy Ratatouille, send-you-back-to-rural-France ass man. Donut's food fucks hard and everyone knows it.

2. Grif

You really think my man Grif loves food as much as he does and doesn't know how to make it? C'mon. He doesn't, like, relish the act of cooking as much as he does having a good plate of food at the end of it. And he's not typically much for sharing. But my guy makes a damn good short rib and bechamel lasagna. Give him the day to let something slow cook, and god damn.

3. Wash

Wash has been living off of MREs for probably his entire adult life, but I feel like he's got a few dishes he can whip out for a date night, or if he's feeling fancy. He knows how to read a recipe, and he has a pretty good idea of what flavors go together to make something good. He probably has a really nice papardelle with vinho verde sauce that he has sitting around in the back of his head for special occasions.

4. Tucker

Okay, Tucker isn't a bad cook by any means, ok? He's great with breakfast food specifically. It's just that he isn't especially fancy about it. He was probably, like, a line cook at Denny's in high school, so all his food tastes like food you would get at Denny's. Which isn't a bad thing! You would just never call Denny's "fine dining". He has his niche, and he does it well, and he never feels even a little bit inclined to do anything different or better.

5. Church (Alpha)

Church isn't much of a foodie right off the bat, but someone's got to pack Caboose's lunch, and he ends up learning how to cook fairly well after that. After a certain point, he figures out how to make things from scratch--mostly things like chicken nuggets, mac and cheese, pancakes.

6. Simmons

I feel like Simmons mostly lives off of shit like green smoothies and homemade granola. Like, hardcore, low carb, vegan, all organic, high protein diet. And, like, it doesn't taste BAD. But it definitely isn't the kind of thing you bring to the red team dinner club. He does make a really nice sunbutter brownie that he has to hide from Grif.

7. Caboose

Caboose has been banned from using any objects in the kitchen that involve a heat source--which isn't HIS fault! How was he supposed to know that you're supposed to take the spoon OUT of the mac and cheese before putting it in the microwave? That's just a recipe for a cold spoon! Anyways, he manages just fine without the microwave, thank you very much. He can make ants on a log like it's nobody's business. Cleaning up afterwards is another matter entirely.

8. Carolina

Carolina is one of the most competent individuals you will ever meet. She could kill you in under a minute, in 30 different ways, and that's just with her bare hands. The fourth time Sarge tries to recruit her into red team is by inviting her to the monthly dinner club. She shows up empty handed, and when Donut very politely asks what she brought, she replies that it's very interesting that they expected the only woman on the team to go all out with cooking. They move on. Carolina spent 5 hours in the kitchen this afternoon trying to figure out how to use the oven. But they don't need to know that.

9. Tex

Now, listen. Tex can't be called a bad cook, precisely, because that would require she cook for herself or others. Which is something she does not do. That's what Church is for, isn't it?

10. Sarge

Sarge refuses to step foot in a kitchen after the fifth shouting match about how flamethrowers are not a universally recognized kitchen appliance.

11. Church (Epsilon)

One time, while blue team is shooting the wind, Caboose asks Epsilon what his favorite breakfast food is. Instead of calling Caboose a dumbass, as per usual, he instead goes into extensive detail about how he eats computer keys like cereal. Caboose tries it. It isn't very good.

[rayleearts]

I don't know if this has been asked but how good are all realta at cooking?

Elowen: mastered the basics and will tweak recipes and technique until they’re perfect, but isn’t familiar with a lot of ingredients and newfangled electric stoves. Doesn’t know how (or want) to cook meat

Amelia: An excellent baker and a good cook. Learned from her biological father who was a baker. Cooked a lot for Ikah as a kid as thanks for taking her in

Fletcher: can make Mac and cheese

Milo: often burns his cooking and gets frustrated with baking, but he’s stubborn enough to get it right eventually (you might have to wait 3 hours for food)

Kasi: measures with her heart, cannot follow written directions. Is good at the recipes from her home that she’s memorized

Ava: somehow makes food bland but really spicy. She tries to forage ingredients when possible and cooks vegan. Fletch, Milo, or Kasi often went to the city to get take-out

Oryn: thinks he’s great but is lowkey average. His gf plays it up to boost his confidence

Eden: cooks with love and you can tell. It won’t be healthy but it’ll be damn good

Rune: finds cooking annoying. Once she makes a recipe, she uses magic to replicate the steps for her

[heymacy]

hello pals! it's time for a (very late) weekly tag game wednesday! (yes, it's still wednesday in chicago!) i was tagged by @energievie, @deedala, @palepinkgoat, @juliakayyy, & @jrooc - thanks pals!

about you

name: macy

age: thirty and flirty and surviving

star sign: cancer

your first language: english, the dumbest language

second language: i can take your coffee order in perfect spanish and i think that's my biggest accomplishment in the last few years

favorite lip product: aquaphor!

the best food dish you can make without a recipe: ........boxed mac and cheese

if you drink tea, what kind?: sleepytime tea, peppermint, and earl gray (depending on the time of day)

if you drink coffee, what roast do you usually get?: i drink cold brew which i think is technically a medium roast? ah shit, i'm totally getting fired

favorite thing to watch on youtube right now: i almost exclusively use YouTube for ASMR videos

favorite thing to watch on youtube in 2012: jenna marbles i miss you every fucking day

favorite item of clothing right now: a Whidbey Island, WA sweatshirt that i magically found at a thrift store here in Chicago! the world is so small and i miss home!

favorite item of clothing in 2012: my VS PINK leggings, the kind with the thick ass waistband, y'all remember those? mine were black and baby pink

fandom

three movies you recommend: i'll give y'all my letterboxd top four: Some Like It Hot, Portrait of a Lady on Fire, Pride and Prejudice (2005) and Moonrise Kingdom

your favorite concert: CHAPPELL ROAN!

have you ever unfollowed someone over a fandom opinion? unfollowed? babygirl this is a blocking household

have you ever left a fandom because of the fans? not because of the fans, no. i keep my circles pretty tight and use the block button liberally. i only leave when the fixation breaks and even then i still linger about like a specter of fandom's past

the best tv show you watched last year: suddenly i don't remember a single TV show i watched last year, YIKES. now if you'd said movie...[cracks knuckles] how much time y'all got?

do you have a fancasting you just can't let go of? none come to mind!

a ship you've abandoned: i do not abandon my children, i just sometimes-occasionally-infrequently-intermittently forget to pick them up from daycare, that's all

on a scale of 1-10 how willing are you to share your ao3 history? [sweeping gesture] look upon my archive and see that i am an open book

do you have a fandom tattoo? nope!

what fandom do you wish was bigger? talk to me about Anastasia (1997)

has a finale ever ruined a show for you? ruined? no. soiled a little bit, left a sour taste in my mouth, riddled me with disdain? sure, often!

have you...

swam in an ocean? many times!

been vegan/vegetarian? yes, both at different times in my life!

gone skinny dipping? yes!

gone skiing? yes!

been to a convention? yes!

i'm tagging @gardenerian, @7x10mickey, @mmmichyyy, @callivich, @captainjowl, @sleepyfacetoughguy, @arrowflier, @too-schoolforcool, @sickness-health-all-that-shit, @y0itsbri, @creepkinginc, @pomegran4te, @sxltburn, @thisdivorce, @vintagelacerosette, @crossmydna, @michellemisfit, & @transmickey ✨

[radicalslights]

I watched one of Steve1989mreinfo's videos the other day after years of just not really visiting his channel because he was going too far, tbh. just eating expired stuff and not caring about the effects on his health grossed me out.

so the people making the Spanish MREs included several vegan options in the vegetarian menu including a vegan coffee mix and Steve immediately starts ranting about how the additives or whatever they have it it was going to give him a stomach ache and he's literally never done this before. he will eat 120-year-old powdered beef and not have the same derisive tone which is fucking insane. I've watched hundreds of these videos since 2016, he will acknowledge occasionally that it's a bad idea to consume old powdered dry milk which he's right I mean it's fucking breast milk that we should not be consuming to begin with but the stuff he was eating wasn't expired it was fresh powdered coffee or something. The additives in vegan food are quite literally no different from what they add to everything else, It's all industry standard. The chemicals they use in his chemically separated chicken apparently are not as big as a concern as an emulsifier in a vegan coffee or a vegan smoothie powder.

granted if it's vegan protein there might be heavy metal contamination in it but it feels like big dairy is trying to steer people towards consuming stuff that is pretty bad for us by pretending that vegan protein powders are evil because they contain heavy metals due to being plants that absorb those heavy metals from the environment especially if the plant in question is the cocoa bean. I'd wager that Cocoa flavored products of all types have similar levels of lead in them.

anywaysss he consumes shit with a ton of preservatives and a ton of sketchy ingredients The vast majority of it is not vegan and expired and he decides to talk in that really uncharacteristic tone about a non-expired powder mix. this guy also routinely calls things in a foil package fresh tasting which I sincerely doubt that they are. I've tried a handful of like soups and stews and sauces in foil packets these past few years and they have never tasted fresh or as good as fresh regardless of their price point or brand. The cheap Chana masala was probably the worst but I mean the formulation of the sauce was just weird and salty in general. like recently I bought some vegan mac and cheese that came with the sauce already made in a packet and it tasted so much worse than the powder version that you add milk and butter to yourself. way worse.

[gojinka]

🍕 - What is their favorite food? for fido, buck, and any other characters you want because i am obsessed with that ask you answered a while back about all your agents dietary habits. it was so in-depth and well written and made me hungy

YAY glad to hear!!!

Fido - fried gizzards, burgers, mac n’ cheese, unhealthy greasy junk food or gas station ramen, it’s like a guilty pleasure at this point, he usually survives on those ‘healthy vegan’ tv dinners because he hardly knows how to prepare meals for himself and he worries about his health. (Guy who’s morning routine is eating shredded cheese out the bag brushing his teeth and then sitting outside smoking a cigarette and drinking coffee, “why do I feel like shit all the time”) He likes how filling and delicious home cooked meals are but he loves the listed first few options. They just make him feel like crap afterward .

Buck - he likes sweet fruit desserts, usually, but you’ll win him over with anything that has a cute presentation. He’s not good at baking so he’s always eager to order a dessert when he goes out to eat and chocolate is too sweet for him. I think if you asked him what his favorite food was he’d answer with some expensive salmonid meat product only because it tastes great and it’s not something he’d eat often. But otherwise it’s for sure fruit desserts. (And maybe not super relevant, but. He really likes the taste of green onions and cilantro. 🌿 He also eats a lot of popsicles and other frozen ice creams? He keeps them in the fridge at work since Inkling territory is always so HOT…)

I already rambled about the NSS’s food decisions, but in a nutshell:

July: Sweet fruit (like watermelon or strawberries. Kiwi…)

Alligator: fried junk and anything hearty and meaty; she’s a girl who loves rice… carbs.

Valentine: sweet desserts, but they’ll eat anything. I think alligator has watched her bite one of her rotting house plants before. She will lick a wall if it looks like it has a Taste.

Saint: light foods… rice… unseasoned meat or seaweed flaked on… eggs. Because Octarians have dietary restrictions similar to the dietary choices of wasteland salmonids, usually food cooked by Valentine:

Samah: the same way as Saint, light foods, egg, but dislikes veggies and can sometimes be a little picky. They are overall willing to try anything.